Teachings - Ego Deconstruction
Recognizing the self is the most difficult task for the student; regardless of the number of individuals that have informed the self of how they see the self, it is often refusal that is drawn forth as the self prefers the illusion that has been drawn for the self of the self. Shattering the illusion is often an emotional experience that could last for minutes, hours or even days; it is suggested for the student to spend time in nature, to see the truth in nature – that which is displayed without shield or covering, that cannot run and hide. It is when the consciousness moves into the second kingdom that particular assets are garnered to aid the self in camouflaging the self from predators; it is within the 3rd and the 4th kingdom that the human begins to shield the self from what is believed to be predators, with the façade, the armor, the characters, believing that the self is protecting the self from those who may seek to damage.
It is many, many, many lifetimes before the self awakens to the characters that have been created; these characters are created through experience – those ways of being that have been adopted by the self, reinforced by the lesson plan, and carried forward into the next and the next and the next lifetime, until the self awakens, recognizes the character and commits the self to destruction, deconstruction of the character. Failure to recognize the character insures that the self will continue forth on the self’s path blind, believing that the self is who the self feels the self to be, thinking that all others outside of the self, who bring forth a different image of the self, are all incorrect. It is the lesson plan of Denial and the lesson plan of Separation – both of these lesson plans have the strength funneled to the ego sufficient to truly believe that all, all those surrounding the self are incorrect. All other lesson plans are likely to listen.
It is not to state that the energies will be increased if you have both lesson plans; either lesson plan is adequate to feed the ego sufficiently to discard the opinion of all others surrounding the self. To recognize the character is to look to the self – each moment of each day, to say, “Is this who I truly seek to be or is there a pall upon me…is there a false gaiety? Who am I in this moment…am I different than I was 5 moments earlier, one hour earlier, one day earlier…would I be this individual with any other that came before me or would I become different, dependent upon who was in front of me?” For if the self is different, the self maintains characters and the character need be identified to determine why the self continues to draw forth these behaviors – what success is being tasted due to their presence?
It is important for all to recognize that behaviors lie within the self that are the very foundation of the character that appears upon the surface with great frequency. It is the desire of the Teacher to provide clue to the self of that which lies at the core of the personality, that which prohibits the viewing of the true self. The personality is embraced by the self – is desired by the self, for the ego has convinced the self that these behaviors, these characteristics are desirable – they are what makes the self unique. The self has yet to understand that all are one and that the very foundation of all beings is love. Negative behavior lies deep within; when understood it is seen throughout the self, for it is deep within as well as upon the surface. Once exposed, the student sees with great clarity that which need be attacked vociferously, for anything less will fail.
To understand the self is to understand the need for the characters; the self cannot begin to understand the need for the characters until the characters have been identified. It is to recognize that each character is both positive and negative. It is to look to the lesson plan to determine why the character was created, what behaviors are employed by the character, for it is this process that will enable the self to begin the deconstruction of each character that prohibits the self from learning the lesson.
The characters have been created to teach – there is no other purpose for a character other than to teach. Failure to recognize the service that has been provided to the self indicates that deconstruction will be most difficult, for the character will merely adopt new attributes and become more skillful in hiding from the self. To truly honor the character is to recognize and to embrace the lesson plan, as having been exhibited by the self, through this and potentially many, many previous lifetimes. Approaching the character in a negative way is inappropriate.
It is silence that is abhorred by the human. The mind begins to wander, to entertain the self, to draw forth those things that are important to the mind, the ego – whose duty it is to keep the human busy from birth to death. It is silence that allows that which lies within to burble up, breaking through the surface, bringing recognition to the self of the feelings, the impressions, the purpose of the self. Joining together with others in silence, focused upon desire, brings forth possibility to accomplish that which would be impossible to accomplish for the single individual. It is learning to hold the thought - that which most would judge as a simple task - is actually rarely accomplished by the common man. It is for each to hold each in the thoughts, to recognize the struggle of the other as the self’s own struggle is realized by the self, drawing forth compassion for the self as well as for the other, recognizing that all are in this common struggle, battle to deconstruct the ego – all have been joined in order to support the other, in order to see the self in the other, in order to aid the other in seeing the self in you, whether positive or negative traits.
For the mind tells you – indeed, you are damaging the self; however, the ego states that the deconstruction, that the changes are what is truly damaging to the self. It is this that has been projected out to others; this is why those around you state that this is not a valid path for you from their point of view. Do you understand?
Student: Yes, I think so. I think that when you first told me I see darkness as light and light as darkness – I still haven’t gotten my lenses cleared. I still don’t see straight. I still don’t focus correctly.
Story
Student: Okay
It is totally implausible my sister, with the experiences that you have had, for you to expect me to believe that you do not recognize darkness from light.
Student: Oh, I recognize it in myself.
It is the self that I seek your focus upon.
Student: Am I irredeemable Teacher? Am I hopeless? Have I even got a snowball’s chance?
That is up to you my sister. It is one step, one action at a time. You have seen yourself as the brilliant student, as one who is capable, as one who can do far better than any other. It is the deconstruction of that belief system that is in process, for you are indeed no better than any other my sister; all students struggle, all students suffer, all students wonder if they will make it. It is for you to understand the role that need be played by the self, recognizing the self in all others that the self chooses to judge; it is to see the self for who the self truly is minus the varnish that has been placed around the image of the self by the ego. It is to listen to the self my sister when you say, “Am I irredeemable?” It is to determine why the self asked this question when the self knows the answer.
It was the deconstruction of the ego that caused you to begin to lean. It is to recognize that the ego must be deconstructed, that the self must begin to rebuild the self to be who the self is most desirous of being.
Sharing with others the self’s journey is critical, informing others of the hardship that was experienced by the self in eliminating the interference of the ego as the self began to learn, as the self began to place the self’s focus upon the self. Those who are new to the path benefit tremendously from this sharing, particularly when the sharing is from the heart, particularly when the self is willing to state the details of that which was experienced by the self and how the self came to the realization that the ego had been endorsed for months, potentially years, prior to the breakthrough that was experienced that enabled the self to see the self, that enabled the self to see the ego unveiled.
“Who am I, really?” - this question is asked by the student frequently once stepping forth upon the path to healing. “Who am I…really?” It is a frightening question for many, for it is asked when the self begins to realize that the self is not who the self has believed the self to be; the illusion of the self has been shattered and the mirror is showing the monster that the self has pretended belonged to others throughout the lifetime. The revelation of the self as monster oftentimes is debilitating, removing the self’s ability to eat, to sleep, to think, as the self did prior to these revelations; discomfort becomes a constant visitor - anxiety, restlessness, ever present. The self is agitated, irritated, frustrated, angry, and if the Teacher has been successful, sorrow-filled, to find that the self is indeed that which many have told the self previously was seen, yet the self discarded the words of the other, for the ego convinced the self that it was the words [that] described the other, certainly not the self; the self was merely looking out for the self, the self was merely doing what another would have done had the self not done it first. Rationalization is utilized to encourage lack of conscience for the self who has damaged another once again. Conscience is the state of mind that creates unease, that reminds the self of the words or the actions of the self, replaying it over and over and over again; a general sense of unease - of anxiety, restlessness, irritation, frustration, sorrow - come forth, encouraging the self to examine the experience more closely.
It is my desire to draw forth knowledge that will aid all those students that seek to overcome the power that is wielded by the ego. It is to recognize that the ego has been created by the self as well as all previous selves; this negativity responds to the lesson plan, convincing the self of the importance of protecting, of defending the self. The self that has determined to be open, to open the heart, is the student that has learned that it is the ego alone that shields the heart. To be love is to recognize the role of the ego and to demand its cessation of activity as soon as its presence becomes known.
“I am love. I am openhearted. I seek to assist. I seek assistance. It is my desire to experience all things.” These words incite the ego, demanding its presence to defend, to protect the self. Recognizing that defense and that protection are the responses informed by the lesson plan will aid the self in stating clearly and succinctly, “I am open to all experience. I need no protection for there is nothing to defend. I am love.”
It is these statements that are suggested each time that the student becomes engaged. I am love. I seek to experience all things. I banish the need for defense and protection. I am love. To cough forcefully, to laugh, to do whatever is necessary to dispel the energetic hold that the ego has taken over the heart chakra; the heart has been shielded – the self has become cold, has become defensive, has become offensive, is no longer connected to those around the self, has withdrawn the self’s energies completely, for the self is in need of defense and protection. Failure to recognize that the self is engaged states that the ego has been provided with permission to conduct the experience once again; be assured the ego will select defense and protection each time it is provided with dominion.
I am love. I seek to experience all things. I banish the need for defense and protection.
The student that learns these statements, emblazoning them upon the memories - drawing them forth each time lesson is presented, feeling them within the heart – cannot fail. As long as they remain words in the mind, failure is ensured. It is suggested that the student work with these statements, to feel them – associating the feelings of love with the statement, “I am love” – drawing forth the fondness, the joy that is felt deep inside whenever the self feels loved…the safety, the reassurance that is felt by one who knows that the self can be the self. I seek to experience all things, recognizing that negativity teaches; those who fail to learn are damaged. The goal of the self is to learn. The student that has presented the self to the Teacher, desirous of knowing and healing the self, does not seek to damage the self any longer. It is calling to mind, “This experience brings negativity with it – I do not seek to damage myself nor the other. I shall take this energy, I shall draw it forth and I shall expel it [cough] forcefully. I shall shake the hands, I shall move the feet, I shall run in place, I shall do anything necessary to release the energies from my body until I become proficient at gathering them and expelling them with the cough. It is to recognize that the negative energies are there to ensure failure. The student that becomes aware of the presence of negativity and begins to expel this negativity is the student that learns rapidly.
To defend, to protect guarantees failure; for the other that seeks to aid the self has been informed that the self is not desirous of their assistance - the other that has learned will withdraw, leaving the self fortified, defended, righteous. It is the other that knows that the free will of another should never be interfered with by anyone other than the Teacher. The student that has presented the self to the Teacher has granted permission for the deconstruction of the ego; much testing has been provided prior to the student’s embracement. It is indeed the Teacher that ignores the behaviors, the actions of the student, until the student determines that the path is no longer for the self; only then will the Teacher relinquish the duty that was embraced when the student was accepted.
Understanding that the physical teacher is provided so that healing of the self may be expedited for those who present the selves with commitment and dedication, for the inner Teacher requires the assistance of the physical teacher, to begin the deconstruction of the ego; the deconstruction must be started so that the inner Teacher can be heard, for as long as the ego has full voice, the student cannot hear, cannot distinguish the difference between the voice of the inner Teacher versus that of the ego.
The student who presents the self to the Teacher, seeking guidance, counsel, assistance to return to the self’s divinity is often plagued by an overabundance of faith in the self or a lack thereof. It is rare that the student has the appropriate balance; therefore, the Teacher must present lesson, noting the student’s confidence or the lack of confidence that is encountered. It is difficult to comprehend that lesson failure does indeed bolster the confidence of the student, providing the self with experience that can be relied upon, for the self now knows what is most appropriate for the self. The student that fails to recognize the overabundance or the lack of confidence is one who will continue to fail; unaware that failure is rooted in the overabundance or the lack of faith in the self.
To believe in the self is necessary. I am Osiris. I am love. I am the Teacher. It is my duty to destroy the confidence that is felt by the self - to totally deconstruct the character that believes that the self is better than, that believes that the self knows all that is needed to enable success - and to then provide lesson to enable the self to garner the experience that is needed, so that the self can truly believe in the self without question.